Why?

Hello! It's me. Well, I dunno who else it could be haha! I have done an amazing amount of stuff for the first dreaded day of the week. I wrote myself a list and have got to the bottom of it (excluding downloading Microsoft Frontpage which was such a boring job I'm glad I didn't). I'm so so bored of doing all this boring boring paper stuff. I feel like I have to be old when I just want to enjoy being a baby and dance and sing and shout about and smack my guitar and do gigs and all I seem to be doing at the moment is scraping about trying to solve paperwork problems and get a bloody record out without selling my soul or obtaining a meek false personality to get the money together to pay for musicians and studio time and a tour in Japan and all that other lovely exciting stuff. Loads of people are forever asking why we aren't headlining any of these major festivals and why you hear all these other crappy bands doing so well and why they release boring female artist after another and why isn't it me and why aren't my songs in the charts and blahdeblahdeblah.....Well at least I'm not the only one who gets frustrated!

Well, when Why? Well, I guess because it ain't as easy as it all looks and although I'm doing my best there's always something else to be done. My magic wand is just for show. Anybody got an easy life? Unfortunately I don't have a big Kylie stylie money machine steam rolling my path for me so muddling on learning things trial by error is where it's at for now. Some days it feels like I'm doing nothing and that I'm unhappy and that the whole world is against me and I'll never get anything off the ground and all that negative stuff. But today I put three new tracks that I've written on my stereo and I thought they were really original and positive and cool and it reminded me that it's all good after all. Music's fabulous and I'm doing pretty well. Not three bad for an estate chick who left home as a teenager with no exams and no future. Yep, I'm doing well alright! Hahahaha. SO, now it's party time and I'm all happy again after a wee little downer. Apart from the immediate problem of being a little skint, (beans on toast never hurt anyone) the future is looking well bright. Gee, that little waffle's worn me out. Bed time is callin me away from this box, back soon! XXXX